travel nurse: 0 me: 4

boatsideso far my experiences with the travel nurse have been pretty bad, so i decided to try a different location. i figured it would be better in new place. santa clara seems nice.

no such luck. same results. same incompetent, cluelessness. same confusion about how long i was going to be gone, what countries i was going to, what vaccines i needed. of course, by now, i knew to be prepared. i knew exactly which vaccines i wanted, i knew which antibiotics to request and i knew which anti-malaria drugs the malaria in that region had grown resistant to. she agreed when i told her i needed the japanese encephalitis series and typhoid. she even pointed out that since i was traveling for so long out of the country i should get a polio booster. excellent. good information!

so about those antibiotics, can you order a prescription for me? oh, no, your doctor has to do that. ok, can you request that? oh, no. you have to ask him for that. i thought you were the travel nurse! ok, fine… i can work around this and get my antibiotics. no problem.

but then it came time for the rabies booster. oh, rabies? you want a rabies booster? have you had the rabies series already? yes. yes, i have. hence the use of the word “booster” not “series.” oh, hmmm. right. well there’s a blood test to check to see if you still have immunity. great! let’s do that! oh, your doctor has to authorize that test. ok, that’s fine can you put in the request for that? oh, no you have to ask him. ok fine. so i make my humble request, get my blood taken and wait patiently for my blood results.

i see the travel nurse again the following week for round two of the japanese¬†encephalitis. still no results from the blood work. the following week i get my last round of japanese¬†encephalitis plus the flu shot. still ¬†no results from the blood work. ok, so at this point what are my options if the blood work doesn’t come back in time? well, you can just ask your doctor for the booster. are you kidding me? why didn’t we just do that in the first place? i again, submit my humble request and also ask about getting the H1N1 vaccine. my doctor helpfully informs me that i’m not in a high risk category but i can lie and tell them i’m trying to get knocked up, if i want. he also authorizes the rabies booster. the booster is a series of three shots at day 0, 7 and 21. um, right. did i mention i’m leaving saturday?

as for the H1N1, let’s just say it’s good to have friends!

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