bioneers epilogue

I have this urge to walk home from Bioneers. I fear that the faster I drive away, the faster the cocoon of change that has been shrouding me and protecting me all weekend will slip away.

I can already feel it.

I can feel the revolution dripping off of me as I speed down the freeway. The seeds of change are already gently unrooting themselves, as I head towards the reality of bills and deadlines and expectations. Slowly, doubt and apathy are creeping back into place as I pass exit after exit. I must fight the urge to pull the car over and collect the pieces of my empowered self.

All too quickly I am home. Home, where animals need to be fed and plants need to be watered. Home, where there are no passionate speeches about saving our biodiversity to listen to nor progressive groups protecting native peoples rights to learn about and join. There are only invasive dust bunnies and complacent cats. I curl up in bed to read something inspirational, in hopes of clinging to the conviction that was awakened inside of me this weekend.

I dream of peace and revolution. Cooperative conflict, compassionate understanding, active listening and passionate storytelling. I dream that there are solutions to the most basic and complex problems and that in some small way I contribute to this peaceful, brave new world.

I dream that we are all fiercely present in our own lives.

In the morning, things look a little brighter than they did last week. The lavender is more fragrant, breakfast is tastier and the sunrise more miraculous than ever.

All things seem possible again.

Perhaps all the passion, all the change, all conviction isn’t gone. Hopefully it’s out there floating in the breeze, just waiting for the right moment to come forward again.

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